Indian Samurai इंडियन सामुराई

Pregnancy is fine but well, the time of giving birth did come at some point. Not that I was in a hurry but, as I read somewhere, we never saw a 24-month pregnant woman!

 

Determined to follow Mother Nature’s ways as much as possible (i.e. to avoid caesarean delivery), I let the British midwife to convince me to try to aquatic experience... She had nice arguments, like the relaxing effect of hot water which is a natural painkiller.

 

Them, to support her theory, she found nothing better than showing me, like that, completely out of the blue, a video of a water birth at home. It was very, very hard for me not to burst into tears. And not of emotion before this miracle of nature, no. Of terror. I am still traumatized by this video, and the image of the huge woman with huge boobs giving birth in her living room, with her eldest daughter, husband, mother, dog around.

 

Giving life to a child is supposedly the most beautiful thing in the world. But then why so much suffering huh?? The midwife, wanting to be reassuring, commented on the video: "you see, sometimes, she even smiles between two contractions”. Fantastic!

Well, anyway, this pain I couldn't start to imagine it, so I focused on a detail that may seem trivial: the heavy breasts of this mother. Already, being myself very reserved, I was really worried about having my parts exposed to the entire human race during childbirth. And I had started seriously considering delivering all alone in my bathroom when the midwife added, as if she had read my mind: 'don’t worry, you can keep a spaghetti top or a sports bra. And to close the deal with this argument: “water birth is definitely the most intimate way to deliver a baby, because you are all alone in your pool, nobody to stare between your legs". Sold!

 

A few weeks before the D-day, I went to the pool of a hotel to test the waters... I was indeed curious to see if it would have the desired effect: everyone recommended me immersion to get relief, to feel lighter. I did not feel any lighter when entering the water... On the other hand I did feel heavier when getting out of it! But anyway, since I had no problems with gravity, I decided to not renew this experience...

 

(To be continued...)