Indian Samurai इंडियन सामुराई

After one month away from home I decide to take back possession of my place. Which means getting rid of all the vermin the monsoons generously bring along. Not only because my parents are coming next week, no no no, it is also because it has become really filthy.

Now picture this!!

My maid enters the house to see me half naked, a terra-cotta mask on the face (all the vermin must go), perched on a stool cleaning the walls. She got a shock and found the motivation to also climb on a stool to clean the fans. Which have turned from white to black with dirt and this is no image…

Had she entered half an hour before, she would have found me getting rid of the dead mini-flies that keep appearing in my fridge after it got accidently unplugged for half a day two weeks ago… Which led me to inspect the fridge and discover all the black fungus thriving in the rubber thing.

Had she left half an hour later, I would have taken her to help me clean my car. For some reason water manages to get in and I have a nice grass blossoming on the passenger seat floor and anything in fake leather is covered with fungus.

Cleaning the walls proved a tedious task with orange and grey spots everywhere. And plain dust as well. I didn’t have the guts to clean the wall where infiltrations have been unstoppable – it has been raining more in my living room than outside! Which led my wooden shelf to turn white.

And to finish my “fumigation” I attacked my cat’s ear which has a special monsoon-parasite!

Aren’t monsoons fun??!!!

Lesson(s) of the story:

1. I can now recognize a KTM motorcycle in the street:

2. Everybody can not be eBay. 

3. If you have any such request please forget me!

The full story here: PDF

Except that the Speed Post is open til 2 PM!

And they even agree to send the hugger. And I wasn’t so sure about that…!

They weigh it (2.2 kg) and give me the price (2,200 Rs, about 30 euros and ten times the price of the hugger, and 50% more than the normal courier). In addition it has a tracking number. I don’t hesitate too long...

I sit there to finish packing and then I hear THE dreaded word. The one word I didn’t want to hear: “kapra”. Kapra is synonymous with big problems even though in fact it just means fabric.

When you send a parcel by post in India, God knows why, you have to wrap it in white cloth. In some Post Offices there is guy whose job is to stitch the fabric but in all cases you have to buy the fabric and in this area I had no idea where to find it...

So, I start to beg, please no kapra!

The lady at the counter insists – women will not have been my allies in this story...

But I hear a guy in the back saying in Hindi that the white cloth is not mandatory with Speed Post. I give him my most beautiful smile!!

One hour to send my parcel: a record!