Indian Samurai इंडियन सामुराई

While I’m busy playing doll, a lot is happening in India! Budget must have required all the imagination of the authorities (and they needed some to increase the Defense envelope at the expenses of Health and Education). So now they must be jobless since their latest game is about banning things.    

Starting with the movie Fifty Shades of Grey. In case showing a sexy movie to a big number of frustrated people would trigger some ideas – like if the said frustrated people had to go to the theater to see asses and tits ;) The party of the Prime Minister did not ban sexual education (in Maharashtra in 2007) to have bum slaps on big screens! 

Then with the BBC documentary India’s Daughter about the Delhi gang-rape (and evisceration) of December 2012 - scary:

And with a grand finish, beef (and all the beef-family animals) have been banned in Maharashtra (including in Mumbai). This law, which not only punishes slaughter of cows but also possession and consumption, is obviously pro-Hindu, and too bad for the poor (beef meat being the cheapest), the Christians and the Muslims, the farmers and breeders and the poor old or dying animals.

More about the Sacred Cow in this post and this post.

 

But maybe the Government is doing all that on purpose, to attract attention on India (bad press better than no press)?? In this case, they got it right: sex, rape and cow worshiping, Westerners have developed a passion for these topics… 

Eventually they took me out of the water for good. And then, I was swimming (note the water metaphor, it's beautiful isn’t) in complete surrealism.

 

Imagine. I've always been the first one to say, as more than 80% of the French (2), that if I give ever birth, I will get the epidural. No question about it! With my argument: when you go to the dentist, you get an anesthesia. Well here it’s the same.

And here I was, drowning in pain, and saying nothing. Nothing at all. Not a word. I suffered in SILENCE. Just a voice in my head screaming "but just give me a fucking epidural already!"). A Samourai in all its glory!

And there, out of nowhere an anesthetist materialized, almost sorry to be there: everyone seemed to over-convinced that I wanted a natural birth (probably because I had opted for the water birth) and therefore was against painkillers. So I had to listen to the speech of my doctor who explained to me that I had no reason to be ashamed of reducing pain, that I had already gone through a lot, and that she herself had given birth to twins by caesarean. In total surrealism I was swimming, I tell you!

 

I refused to sniff gas and but accepted a spinal (no time for the epidural). Immediate relief!

 

In short, I ended up giving birth... Lying on a table, legs spread, with my favorite Indian, three gynecs, two pediatricians, an anesthetist, a midwife, and six nurses in the room. And I couldn’t care less! It actually even made me laugh thinking back of the 'intimate' childbirth I had planned!

 

And Baby Samourai was there! On my chest! Peeing on me! That’s how we realized it was a boy: doctors had forgotten to check...

In India, sex determination of the fetus is prohibited, since Indians took advantage of this technology to abort girls – which are expensive, with the dowry. India has a deficit of girls, and in some States it has started to cause serious problems, having to import brides and all (see these posts for more on the topic).

 

And the final word: baby Samourai hates baths, which should not surprise anyone... ;-)

 

(2) The French are apparently more sensitive than the British since only 30% of the latter opt for anesthesia (Sources: http://www.liberation.fr/vous/2011/10/18/70-d-accouchements-avec-peridurale_768628;) http://www.babycentre.co.UK/a542571/epidural)

 

(The End)